AOLFF

Arms of Love Family Fellowship

  • About AOLFF
  • Site Map
  • Home
  • Grace-Based Discipline
    • The 5 Steps
    • The Toolbox
      • Texture Play
    • Active Parenting
    • Do Unto Others
    • The Myth of Needing to Get Away
    • Feelings
    • Manager, or Leader?
    • Right vs. Judgemental
    • GBD and Deployment
    • Words as Magic
  • Spare the Rod…
    • The Spanking Files
      • History of Spanking
      • Punishment in the Old Testament
      • Punishment as a Last Resort
      • Natural Consequences
    • The Ironic Dynamic
    • Now What?
    • Hebrews 12
    • The Standard
    • An Answer to Proverbs 23 and 'beatest'
    • False Doctrine of Spanking
    • The Spanking Files II
      • A Matter of Age…
      • What About Other Punishments?
      • Obedience, or Idolatry?
      • What's the Difference?
  • Spoil the Child?
    • Age Appropriate?
    • TCS
    • Boundaries
  • Sermons
    • Submission
    • How to Make Your Husband Feel Like a King
    • Resolution Skills and Boundary Setting
    • Standing in the Gap
    • Kindness vs. Obedience
    • Where is God When I Need Him?
    • How to Have Self-Esteem
    • Echad
  • Books
    • Grace-Based Living
    • Biblical Parenting
  • Quick Reference
    • Aggressive Toddlers
      • When will he ever stop hurting me?
      • Hitting for attention
      • What about biting?
      • My 4-year-old is so bossy!
      • What about those intense emotional storms?
    • Teaching "No Hitting"
      • Boys who hit
    • Using 'As Soon As'
      • Should I Compromise With Them?
    • Consequences…
    • Directions
      • How does this work for my little ones?
      • How do you keep it playful?
      • Silly rules vs Real rules – won't they get confused?
      • Choices and Meltdowns…
      • Teaching him respect…
      • Motivation or Manipulation – is there a difference?
      • Teaching them to be responsible for own behavior – HOW?
    • Sharing vs. Taking Turns
    • Dealing With Annoying Behavior
      • Why are they so much worse in restaurants?!
      • My child won't obey unless I promise him a reward!
      • How do I deal with sassiness?
      • She won't stop sticking out her tongue!
    • Standards of Behavior
      • What do you do when….?
      • How do you handle it when…?
    • Coping With Babies and Toddlers
      • My toddler keeps hitting my baby!
    • Ages One to Three
    • Ages Four to Six
    • Feeling Good, Acting Good
      • Teaching Leaving Successfully
    • Nice vs. Kind
    • Teaching "No Lying"
    • Tantrums
    • What About Forgiveness?
    • She wants to play all the time!
    • If the rules are posted, are consequences punitive?
  • September 3, 2010

Grace-Based Discipline

Grace-Based Discipline (GBD) is a parenting style which is Biblically supported and rooted in the New Testament teachings of Grace. In my book, "Biblical Parenting," I fully believe that the popular parenting teachings of today are not based on a proper understanding of how God would have us be in relationship with our children. God is about relationships-attaching and not detaching, connecting and not disconnecting. Too often parents are taught that their discipline choices can even guarantee … [Read More...]

Spare the Rod

The reason this section of my site is called "Spare the Rod" is because this verse, and a handful of verses that mention the Rod, have been touted as teaching the modern day practice of spanking. In fact, I often get emails from people who have visited my site and want to ask me why I don't know that the Bible teaches parents to spare the rod and spoil the child. That isn't Scripture-it's a poem by Samuel Butler called "Hudibras" and, in fact, he is talking in the poem about the topic that provides … [Read More...]

Spoil the Child

In this section of the site I want to address the dangers and issues of permissiveness. Unfortunately, most people in America are under the impression that you have a choice between being punitive and being permissive. Those who don't want to be permissive embrace a punitive style of parenting, and those who don't want to be punitive typically embrace permissiveness The reasons vary but some of the most popular reasons include having been parented with punishments and not wanting … [Read More...]

The Lutton Family

Visit the Lutton Family

Hear Understand Obey

Visit the Shema Congregation

Contact Us

  • Arms of Love Family Fellowship
  • P.O. Box 12403
  • Glendale, Arizona 85318
  • Email Pastor Crystal

About AOLFF

I earned a Master of Arts in Theology from Fuller Theological Seminary in 2000, and am a Ordained Pastor in the Church of the Nazarene. I am Senior Pastor of the new Messianic Nazarene Congregational Plant … [Read More...]

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